I was thinking about what it takes for individuals to make an impression on us. Why do we hold on to some people and let others go so easily?
Does loves taste ever really disappear, or does it simply store itself away for those times when all you want to do is eat toast and never leave the house?
Why do we hold on to the pieces & shapes from our past? What’s in it for us?
I wish I knew the answer.
I still hold on to the image of a girl I only dated for maybe 3 months. For some reason, in my mind, she was the perfect girl for me, she was the one that got away, and I was the one responsible for my unhappiness.
It has probably been well over a year since we were together but I still hold onto the thought of her and the thought only becomes more intensified as time goes by.
I know that this is unhealthy, but Like aged wine the kiss only gets sweeter.
Did I miss my chance, did I miss my one shot at love? These are the questions I ask sometimes at 4am as I look at the ceiling in the darkness.
I even think of her on the good days which lately, are more often than not, but, although clouded by my foolish hopes and dreams, I did get one thing right.
I am responsible for my own unhappiness and I have taken full responsibility for it. We’ve gotten quite comfortable actually, I think I might have to call things off though, it’s grown so incredibly needy.
I’ve come to the realization that if you love someone, that love never really passes away it just stays in that moment, a ball of energy suspended in time never fading and always lasting.
This thought puts me back to sleep when my demons come crawling and gives me the courage to tell unhappiness where it can go.
I simple say “it’s time we see other people”.
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